You'll Either Die a Hero, Or Live Long Enough to Become a Grey In the year 2030, a dying scientist released a volatile pathogen into the atmosphere. It granted the elderly a plethora of augmented abilities, near-immortality, and an insatiable bloodlust for the generations that have wronged them. The war between the Greys and the Resistance has now been raging for over two hundred years. The Resistance are all but defeated. Their survival depends on the success of one man’s mission—infiltrate the Grey’s sanctum and retrieve the antivirus. Raised in solitary confinement on a strict diet of cigars and alcohol, Wilhelm Baggotry has successfully prematurely aged his body to that of a ninety-year-old. But will it be enough to fool the Greys and gain their trust? Or will the Resistance be destroyed, and youth become a thing of the past? Coffin Dodgers is a bizarre tale of love, loss, and depravity that is guaranteed to leave you with an irrational fear of butterscotch.