How Not To

Series · 6 books · 2010-2013

By Stephanie Burke

Books in series

How Not to Date an Alien

2010

Kilana knows what her eyes are telling her can't be true. There's a naked man in her bed and he's glowing. And then there are the solid black eyes, the floating several feet above the bed, and the most damning of all... he has antennas. The newly divorced Kilana thinks she's seeing things, but when he opens his mouth and tells her he's hunting humans and his intentions are to devour her, Kilana knows she has an alien problem. But who will help her get away from the admittedly sexy creature that wants her pleasured and fattened until her flavor is perfect? Maybe her hair-brained friends Se and Lena can help her avoid the big suppertime cut... Or maybe she's on her own with the drooling, leering, orgasm-delivering fiend. And maybe dating an alien won't turn out to be as big a problem as she thinks.

How Not To Date A Fae

2011

Deception and betrayal have driven Ario from the only home he's ever known, but he's determined to never look back, and never use magic again—until he gets hit with pixies, fate, and an irresistible red-headed Fae. Cailte was one of the Finnian army, Finn mac Cool's right hand. Waking from his centuries-long sleep, the large warrior finds himself at the mercies of a different time—and a man unlike any other. If they're to survive, they must forge a bond strong enough to defy the gods. And Ario may discover dating a Fae isn't so bad, after all.

How Not to Date a Skunk

2011

Photographer Bilana thinks she can beat the heat and her migraine by taking her meds and getting out of the sun. But she wakes up to find her whole world order being changed before her eyes. Chaska is a powerful Dakota warrior in full regalia, defending his right to pick the mate of his choosing. But when Bilana stumbles into a centuries-old rite, he finds himself having to save the beautiful black woman's life by claiming her for his own. Now Bilana has an insolent young warrior, a set of elders, and a shapeshifter mate all invading her peace and quiet. She has to learn to accept change as it comes, but that's what happens when you learn how not to date a skunk.

How Not to Date a Vamp

2011

What do you get when your greatest strength lies in not dying easy? If you are lucky and no one confuses you with a pop culture vampire, and if you diet and exercise to keep your weight down, you just might get the girl. But first you have to avoid the hunters on your trail, the cost of replacing your clothing, and get over your phobia about wood. Only if he overcomes these obstacles will Virgil spend the better part of his afterlife with Barb. If he can survive dating.

How Not to Date a Bear

2012

One night of passion, and Gillian’s life is a Mafia movie. That’s what you get when you date a bear. Declan Batalova is a bear unlike any other. After brokering a deal that will keep his people safe in their new country, the Russian shifter goes for relaxation in a new club that caters to bears. Cosmetologist Gillian Leekey is a woman on a mission. She loves big, muscular, hairy men, and Declan is perfect in every way. But after one night of passion, the Bear Shifter Mafia is declaring war at her front door! When did life get so complicated? But that’s what happens when you decide to date a bear.

How Not to Date a Centaur

2013

Good girl Kiara Stone only wanted to have a little fun for once in her life, and parachuting over Cambodia seemed like a thrill. But crash landing through a mountain and landing in the land of the centaurs was almost too much. Now she is their goddess and under the protection of two very regal male warrior partners, Zeethan and Xaylu, and struggling to learn a new culture as foreign to her as her ways are to them. Hopefully she can learn fast enough not to start a war, destroy their whole belief system, and learn to date a pair of centaurs, because it looks like there is no returning home.

Author

Stephanie Burke

Author · 36 books

Stephanie is a multi published multi award-winning wife and mother of two whose unparalleled imagination causes her no end of trouble. From sex shifting shape-shifting dragons to under sea worlds, up to sexually confused elemental fey and homo erotic mysteries, all the way to pastel challenged urban sprites, Stephanie has done it all, and hopes to do more. Stephanie is co-founder of the charitable organization Write 4 Hope, Co Creator of the Japanese Culture and Anime Convention Mikomicon, Home-school Mom, English Tutor, an Orator on her favorite subject of writing and world building, a sometimes teacher when you feed her enough coffee and donuts, an anime nut, a costumer, and a frequent guest of various sci-fi and writing cons where she can be found leading panel discussions or researching more and varied legends and theories to improve her writing skills. Stephanie is known for her love of the outrageous, strong female characters, believable worlds, male characters filled with depth, and interracial that make the reader sit up and take notice.