The old days of vampires slinking sexily through the night are definitely a thing of the past. Now, vampires hold day jobs like everyone else, and Justus is no exception. The funny thing about living forever is that you still somehow have laundry and bills to deal with. Enter stage left: JD Cooper, Justus’s new employer. Supposedly, the man is a writing raconteur, known to craft a mean mystery. His skills excel on paper, but suck in reality because he’s one step away from hoarder level. Justus takes the job as his housekeeper, expecting eccentricity. Which he gets. And so much more. Tags: Vampires with day jobs, Justus has it rough, Cooper is a walking disaster, how self-indulgent should I make this, the answer is very, bite kink, book hoarding, this is the least angsty thing I’ve written all year, smother tested, editor approved (This was a short story originally published in the Working Stiffs anthology. With the anthology no longer published, I've chosen to re-release it as a 10k short.)