The personification of paradox, Ruby was a card-carrying nerd, who played in a rock band, a Sunday-go-to-church preacher’s kid, with tattoos down her thigh and a doobie in her pocket. Adept at knowing when to keep her mouth shut and her head down, Ruby could to speak her mind, when the situation required it. Sometimes, coping meant creating stories, into which she would climb, when reality impinged. For Ruby, it was all about finding her way to personhood, which, as anyone who’s done it knows, is challenging at best. When the journey is derailed by the loss of a parent, sometimes the task becomes almost unbearable.