A five-a-side team bites off more than it can chew. A superstar striker who’s a compulsive liar. Two young Old Firm supporters rekindle their rivalry through Subbuteo after a nuclear holocaust. A murderous committee plots revenge on their incompetent chairman, and a funeral service at Claggan Park goes disastrously awry. Meanwhile, at Selkirk Football Club, things continue much as they ever have, i.e. badly. Scottish football’s first ever poet-in-residence, Thomas Clark, dives into the checkered past (and present) of the beautiful game to bring together this hilarious, poignant collection of stories. From pre-revolution Argentina to post-apocalypse Glasgow, this is Selkirk FC… versus The World. “Marvellous work… A world poet, celebrating the universal in the local.” – Ian McMillan “In any kind of society, not just football, this poet can work his magic.” – Ex-Scotland and Hibs striker Garry O’Connor