As a newly appointed youth pastor, I blindly walk by faith, stumbling without the promised light down God’s chosen path. Until a young man resurrects the sinful nature I’ve rejected in my strive for purity. Isaac Van Dusen, my pastor’s son. He’s troubled. Rebellious. Off limits to my lonely heart, yet gives me breath when I feel I’m drowning and in need of a savior. Isaac’s hunger for sin rivals mine, the kind that consumes. Burns like fire and brimstone. I’m determined to stay in a constant state of prayer, begging for delivery from temptation—all while dreaming of being on my knees for entirely different reasons. I want to submit to the unholy craving between us and worship the young man entrusted to my spiritual care. But acting on the lusts of the flesh ensures our fall from grace, and I can’t allow him to be the second one to pay the price for my sins. Even if it means living a lie for eternity.

As an overseas missionary who leads lost souls toward salvation, it’s imperative I live a godly existence, even in the midst of life-shattering grief. Returning to the States brings about a trial worse than the loss of love, and I’m faced with desire for someone forbidden to me by my church and the word of God. Aaron Weston. My best friend’s son who is no longer a gangly teen. He makes me want things no newly widowed man should. His presence fills the emptiness in my life, but my sinful nature longs for more. Every inch of him—in my heart, in my body, making me feel whole again. Giving into the hunger of the flesh will take us down a path of immorality, one that goes against my strive for holiness. I lost my wife from focusing on promised riches in glory. And if I make the same mistake, I fear responsibility for the ruination of another soul.

As an assistant pastor at Simply Grace Church, it’s my duty to abstain from the appearance of evil—which includes keeping my sexual orientation to myself, same as I’ve done with my close-knit family. Yet I knew I was different when at age fourteen, I woke from a dream with the evidence of my desire for him. Aiden McNelis, my older brother’s best friend. But he left for the west coast after graduation, and I chose God. Almost sixteen years later, Aiden’s return catches me unaware, but even more surprising is how he’s changed. He looks at me with more than friendship in his eyes, studies me like he wants to strip me down body and soul. Aiden’s curiosity closely mirrors mine, challenging my spirituality with unholy temptation. But giving into my sinful nature, touching the forbidden, won’t just tear apart the life I’ve built for myself. It will ruin my family as well.

Overcoming addiction hasn’t been a cake walk, and finding self-worth after choosing the path that landed me at rock bottom? Damn near impossible. For me, sex and booze go together like PB&J, so staying clean means no hookups. AA meetings help me stay the course…until a lip-glossed twink walks in and threatens my willpower. Chase is a summer rainstorm, washing away the dust from a too-long drought. He makes me crave the things I’ve set behind me, causing a restlessness I recognize. A new addiction. However, giving in to my desire for Chase will land me back in the hole I crawled from, a place I know I won’t escape a second time. And I’ll never forgive myself if I drag him down along with me.