250 THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT WRITING is a booze-soaked, profanity-brined, Zen-lacquered look at the craft and art of writing, one list of “25 Things” at a time. Featured within this book are the essays “25 Things You Should Know About…” …Being A Writer, Writing A Novel, Writing A Screenplay, Writing A F**king Sentence, Storytelling, Character, Plot, Dialogue, Description, Editing/Revising, and finally, Getting Published. (And yes, that’s actually 11 lists, which means the book actually has *275* things you should know about writing, but let’s be honest, 250 sounds much cooler. Let’s just go ahead and call that, “25 bonus tips,” shall we? Boom. Value added.) The book features sections such as: “The Transubstantiation of Trope,” “Why Bad Decisions Are A Good Decision,” “Nobody Sees Themselves As A Supporting Character,” "I Want To Buy The Semi-Colon A Private Sex Island," and “Plot Is Promise.” Contained within are things you should know about plot holes, self-publishing versus legacy publishing, "on-the-nose" dialogue, story versus plot, metaphors, copy-editing, killing darlings with a claw hammer, cursing like an undead pirate, and generally being a cranky and irreverent creative type.