Siege the castle? Not my style. Save the world? Never gonna happen. Create a bestiary business with a group of beautiful yet contrasting women? Now that’s more like it! One minute I’m in a tree, pointing my camera at a tiger, the next I’m on my back in a medieval fantasy world, while a skittish blonde hovers over me, hoping I’m not dead. I’ve never felt more alive. Because although the dutiful smith’s assistant warns me away from the town’s sinful witch, I still have to go. The witch has the only bestiary book in town, and that’s my one hope of a comfortable life—I don’t feel like donning knight's armor. Turns out, the bestiary is terrible—it's just primitive drawings, annotated by the tall tales of drunken adventurers. I know an opportunity when I see one. It’s a good thing I’ve been transported here with my camera. If only I knew someone with magic powers, able to transfer film to parchment. Someone like the witch, currently scowling at me. How will she look when I turn her house into a walk-in bestiary? And how about a scribe to pen beautiful prose beside the photos? The shy smith’s assistant wrote some incredible weaponry advertisements. I can find a few better uses for her. It’s a shame the girls dislike each other. I’m gonna have to show them they’re more similar than they know. For starters, they’ve both taken a liking to me, and I don’t feel like choosing. Warning, this novel contains an unconventional relationship and adult situations, involving: A shy smith’s assistant with adorable blonde pigtails, who’s going to learn to speak up for herself. A snarky witch in a black dress, who’s going to learn to keep her mouth shut. A vicious goblin, who's going to... you’ll just have to wait and see.

Siege the castle? In my own way. Save the world? If it’s worth my while. Create a bestiary business with a group of beautiful yet contrasting women? Fully achieved. Now the house is too crowded! One moment I'm taking pictures of a fantastic sky beast, aided by a sassy witch, a pretty blonde, and a cute green goblin. The next we’re in bed for the night—and I can't get a lick of covers! This house is too small. It wasn’t meant for this many people and a bestiary business. Problem is, not a lot of folk want a goblin and a witch in their neighborhood. It’s hard to blame them. We can be loud. But there's a lonely house between this town and the city, isolated amongst the grassy fields. The townsfolk say it's haunted. I say it’s perfect. All I need is the key. What I don't need is to get caught between the vicious rivalry of our snooty queen and an even snootier elf! I just want the damn key. Why does the queen have it? Also, her jester keeps getting in my way, and while I don't much mind the view—baby possesses the back—there’s more going on here than meets the eye…

Siege the castle? They open the door for me. Save the world? Let’s not talk about it. Create a bestiary business with a group of beautiful yet contrasting women? How about a second location? A last expedition. There’s just one problem. Coming with me is a wild, crazy jester, and a dark, brooding witch. They’re as different as different could be, but I’ve got to help them get along—and let’s be real, it's mostly Velvet who needs helping. Not just for her sake, but for the rest of my girls too. Who knew a backflipping jester could be such a nuisance at the dinner table? And maybe, just maybe, I can get some cool photos of centaurs and ogres along the way. Let’s hope I escape with my head still intact... A certain queen is partial to it.