If you have a cough you should not be leaving the house! ​Good, now that’s out of the way, gather around for an incredible, erotic tale about an exhausted doctor named Buck Tangle. Buck has been working overtime as he searches for new solutions to combat the trotting plague, a virus that causes uncontrollable trotting. With no new answers, Buck turns to the supernatural, heading up to a spooky old castle in search of vampires who might have an answer. It’s here that Buck meets Count Rimble and Countess Gorba, and while they stress that the most important aspect of avoiding the trotting plague is staying home and washing you hands, they also take a moment to teach Buck about the vampire cough. This pose-like maneuver helps keep coughs and sneezes from infecting others, which is perfect for those in a house with someone they’d like to keep safe. Of course, the vampire cough is also a great way to stay healthy even after the trotting plague ends. Now Buck is looking for a way to repay these gorgeous bisexual vampires, who are proud to suck cock, not blood. As Count Rimble would say in his thick Transylvanian accent, “I vant to pound your butt!” This erotic tale is 4,200 words of sizzling bisexual human on vampire unicorn action.