Some call him a rock god. Others a celebrity bad boy. Me? I call him the arrogant bastard who stole my concert venue. His apology? To take me and my violin on tour with the band. It's an offer I can't refuse, even if it does come with strings attached. Because Rey Thomas isn't who he seems. Life isn't pretty behind the deviant frontman's facade. It's raw, ugly, and at times downright painful. But it's real. And far better than the lie he presents to the world. The man behind the face of Dark Tide is beautiful in his chaos. All I have to do is keep him alive long enough to see that too. PLEASE NOTE: DOWN BEAT deals firmly with the subject of mental illness and its associated effects on not only the sufferer, but those around them. If this is something you feel may be a potential trigger for you, I advise you stop, consider if this book is right for you, and if you decide yes, ensure you have a support person available. Rey's story is an immensely personal one for me and I would love for you to experience it, but not at the cost of your own health and wellbeing.

“What’s it like?” he asked me. “To be happy all of the time?” Truth was, I didn’t know how to put it into words. So I showed him. Love, laughter, and life. I gave Dark Tide’s lead guitarist a glimpse of it all. He wanted more. I longed to give it to him. But every so often fate slips up. Soulmates meet while on incompatible paths. The only thing certain about our future was that there couldn’t be one. “What’s it like to be happy?” I’m not sure I know anymore.

Womanizer. Player. We all know them. And sometimes, we’ve loved one. My first mistake was to trust the rocker with a charming smile. My second, believing he’d never hurt me. My final mistake will not be to repeat steps one and two. People change as they mature. They live, and they learn. Emery? He’s not one of those people. He tells me that he needs me, and I wish I could say I didn’t feel the same. Problem is, I’m also one of those people who never change. But I do learn … And I know that the worst mistake I could make wouldn’t be to repeat the past. It would be to let him go.