Dave Barry didn't know what he was letting himself in for when he invited his Legion of Alert Readers to submit their nominees in the Bad Song Survey. "Song badness," he soon learned, "is an issue that Americans care deeply about." Now John Ritter and Arte Johnson present for you the songs that Americans love to hate. There is Gary Puckett and the Union Gap Band's "Young Girl" ("Young girl, get out of my mind, my love for you is way out of line..."), which is not to be confused with "Woman", and "This Girl Is a Woman Now" (which some readers believe to be the same song). Another strong contender is Neil Diamond's "Play Me", particularly the part where he trills, "song she sang to me, song she brang to me..." And don't forget "Candy Man", "Johnny Get Angry", "Itsy-Bitsy Teeny-Weeny Yellow Polka-Dot Bikini", "Wildfire", and the entire Barry Manilow oeuvre.This much is as soon as you hear even a snippet of these songs, you won't be able to get them out of your head!
Author
Dave Barry is a humor writer. For 25 years he was a syndicated columnist whose work appeared in more than 500 newspapers in the United States and abroad. In 1988 he won the Pulitzer Prize for Commentary. Many people are still trying to figure out how this happened. Dave has also written many books, virtually none of which contain useful information. Two of his books were used as the basis for the CBS TV sitcom "Dave's World," in which Harry Anderson played a much taller version of Dave. Dave plays lead guitar in a literary rock band called the Rock Bottom Remainders, whose other members include Stephen King, Amy Tan, Ridley Pearson and Mitch Albom. They are not musically skilled, but they are extremely loud. Dave has also made many TV appearances, including one on the David Letterman show where he proved that it is possible to set fire to a pair of men's underpants with a Barbie doll. In his spare time, Dave is a candidate for president of the United States. If elected, his highest priority will be to seek the death penalty for whoever is responsible for making Americans install low-flow toilets. Dave lives in Miami, Florida, with his wife, Michelle, a sportswriter. He has a son, Rob, and a daughter, Sophie, neither of whom thinks he's funny.
