I always knew that aliens were watching us. But I never realized it wasn’t like The X-Files out there. More like… The Bachelor? To be fair, the moment I met my Kaleth warrior, I knew I was his. Just like he knew he was mine. It was like a tingling sensation that wouldn’t quit. See, he came to Earth on vacation. I mean, even hard-charging Kaleth warriors have to take some time off from defending the galaxy. And he came over to visit some diners, drive-ins, and dives. He made a list from watching the Food Network (I’m not even joking!) But all is not well in paradise. He’s got a list of enemies a mile long and they want to stop our love at all costs. So we’re on the run from them while trying to give our love a chance to grow. Along the way, we’re heading to a luau and taking surfing lessons. But I know we’ll get through this no problemo. How? You know how they say guac is extra? Well, big bad Kaleth warrior…. So am I.

The only hope for Planet Earth is an alien warrior who is trying to keep up with the Kardashians. Oh sure, Dar the alien warrior is hot and all. With his giant horns. Big ol’ muscles that he uses to lift me up and throw me over his shoulder. Soul piercing eyes. And one very powerful…blaster. But this is a Barghle that’s come to Earth. It’s a nasty, slimy, alien slug-like creature. It’s going to destroy any planetary environment that it’s put in. It’s going to lay thousands of eggs and when those hatch, little Barghlets are going to eat everything and everyone. So when Agency Gamma nabs me, Lara Carpenter, of YouTube fame, and tells me that I’m a genetic match to mate with an alien warrior who is trying to save Earth while also catching up on the Real Housewives, I’m shocked. But when they tell me that my planet depends on it, and he can’t do it without me, I’m all in. It’s like that cheesy song from back in the day. You + Me = Us.