Frankenstein According Spike Milligan
1997
First Published
3.29
Average Rating
127
Number of Pages
How Can I describe my emotions at this catastrophe, or delineate the wretch whom with such infinte pains and care I had endeavoured to form? There was a bolt that affixed his neck to his spine, there were screws holding his forehead to his skull; but now was the moment of truth. I plunged the electrodes into his rectum and switched on the current. He gave a groan and he was alive! He spoke as he sat up, 'Have you got a fag mate?' My God, I had given birth to a nicotine junky! I handed him a cigarette which I lit, then leaping off the table he stood there. But, alas, we had forgotten one thing, he had no support for his trousers which fell to the floor revealing his manhood in all its glory. If any women saw them they would be leaving their husbands in thousands. Quickly I got some string round his trousers. What had I done? No mortal could support the horror of that countenance! I rushed downstairs, to seek refuge in a cupboard where I remained during the rest of the night walking up and down in great agitation, something difficult to do in a cupboard.
Avg Rating
3.29
Number of Ratings
147
5 STARS
18%
4 STARS
24%
3 STARS
32%
2 STARS
21%
1 STARS
5%
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Author
Spike Milligan
Author · 53 books
Terence Alan Patrick Seán Milligan, known as Spike, was a comedian, writer and musician. He was of Irish descent, but spent most of his childhood in India and lived most of his later life in England, moving to Australia after retirement. He is famous for his work in The Goon Show, children's poetry and a series of comical autobiographical novels about his experiences serving in the British Army in WWII. Spike Milligan suffered from bipolar disorder, which led to depression and frequent breakdowns, but he will be remembered as a comic genius. His tombstone reads 'I told you I was ill' in Gaelic.
