Asa Hartvigsen has his life arranged to his liking. He has a tolerable job at the University Library, his apartment arranged the way he wants it, and his parents live four hours away, which isn't quite far enough in Asa's opinion. Asa has nice sensible plans for the evening, and he's not that happy to have his reading disrupted by the arrival of Tan Gordon, a self-admitted party boy who reminds Asa of a stray cat. Freelance journalist Tan has decided to be Asa's friend despite Asa's opposition to the plan. Tonight Tan comes over to remind Asa about a TV special, only to arrive soaked to the skin and wanting to spend the night. Asa is sure that his day off is going to be horrendous when his parents arrive for a surprise visit. Especially as Tan is still asleep on the couch and Asa's mother, who wants to be supportive since Asa announced he was gay, has been researching the subject. Asa is sure that disaster is looming.

Asa and Tan are settling into their changed relationship. Asa is mildly annoyed to get a phone call at work. Fortunately there is no one around to notice his reaction to the vibration in his pocket or to overhear the conversation. Tan has called to warn Asa about a large pink parcel that has arrived addressed to both of them at Asa’s apartment. It is scary, Tan tells him. Asa can think of only one person who would send them a joint parcel in February. Tan confirms that the parcel is from Asa’s Mom, which makes it positively terrifying.