My Vagina's the black hole of the south. Every time I screw a guy he disappears off of the face of the earth—sucked into the great beyond where apparently there’s no cellphones or social networking. Because of that, I live the one night stand life. I’m the revolving door of my apartment complex—the knob that everyone gets to turn once, but it’s time I tried something new. I don’t care if it takes a hundred cocky douche-bags, momma’s boys, and minute men, I will find the one for me. He’s out there somewhere, and it’s only a matter of time before I find him. Speed dating or not.