Herb Moss is a nice young man. He's a Vegan. It's a good life, really; he's engaged to his childhood sweetheart Lily, has a job with his father's firm, and can look forward to a solid if unexciting future. And if he's bored and wistful every time he thinks about it—well, that's normal, isn't it? Surely, thinks Herb, a little romantic correspondence on the side can do no harm. Especially if Lily doesn't find out. Meanwhile, on a planet far away, a nice young woman named Spring only wishes she were bored. Spring's been living with her widowed father Gabriel, a practicing sorcerer, keeping house and helping out with the business. It's been a good life. But the evil wizard Zygote has learned of the existence of those secrets. And he'll do anything to get them, including the obvious. When Gabriel is killed, Spring takes refuge with the austere Order of Companions. There, grieving and lonely, she places a personal ad, looking for a pen pal who can discuss botany. Little does she know that she's actually placed a personal ad in Play Plant magazine, and that her new pen pal Herb thinks she's interested in romance. When Zygote closes in on her, Spring flees to the only friend she can think her buddy Herb. Trouble ensues—with Zygote following close behind it!