What can I say? I’m a work in progress. I never planned on being 39 and still a virgin. Life got in the way and before I knew it I was almost 40 with a cherry that had yet to be popped. So, I pulled up my big girl panties and made a bucket list to accomplish before the big 4-0. Easy peasy, right? It only took three bottles of wine, the internet, and a dating site to flip my world on its side. What came next would consist of part disaster and part greatest thing to ever happen to me. My new life consisted of plenty of men and plenty of dates. None of those were with the one man I wanted more than anything. He was untouchable. With his heated looks and seductive voice, I was in trouble. My restraint, willpower, and a non-fraternization policy were the only things keeping us apart. None of it mattered to him. He was determined to have me and damn the consequences. With men, awkward dates, a geriatric wedding, naughty needle-pointing, and a sexy as sin boss the last year of my thirties had the potential to be one I would never forget.

My life is a hot mess. I love sex. I'm not shy about it. Honestly, it's the only kind of relationship I've had with men. That was until I slept with my boss. Now, I have no job, no car, and an aunt with a drinking problem living with me. My life was in the shitter. Well, my friends had a proposition. Stop having sex with random guys, have a genuine friendship with one while going on platonic dates, and they will dress up with me for Comic Universal. Everything until the dressing up part made me cringe. But what did I have to lose? My life came with caution cones and police tape. While I found the perfect man to be friends with, I didn't count on what those friend dates would do to me. His sweet smile and kind eyes made me rethink my position on relationships. Could I really let a man into my life further than my panties? Could I risk my heart when my life was a wreck? Could I do all this while resisting climbing the man like a monkey? I was a big girl. I could handle the challenge, even if that meant wearing a chastity belt around him. Between my crazy aunt, her menagerie, his bananas granny, an evil child at daycare, and a father in a hippie cult, I could do anything. My life was about to get a lot messier.