Kids can be such monsters. Literally. From the award-winning author of Hidden Talents, two remarkable short story collections - Kidzilla and The Witch's Monkey \- together for the first time. Plus several brand new stories. Each hilarious and harrowing. A substitute teacher finds out she has some monsters for students. A group of kids attempt a levitation trick with hair-raising results. A neighborhood is so boring the grown ups are turning into...well...you know. And dozens more. So don't be a weenie! Read these stories!

Watch out for the road weenies! A town is overrun by road weenies—a.k.a. joggers—who never smile. A girl thinks she's too old for Halloween...until she finds a special pair of gloves. A boy takes a shortcut to an unexpected place. A mummy takes his revenge, one little piece at a time.... Welcome to the weird and wacky world of award-winning storyteller and master of the macabre, David Lubar. These thirty-five tales ranging from the silly and offbeat to flat-out horrifying are just right for reading alone or for telling aloud in the dark. As an added bonus at the end of the book, David answers the question most frequently asked of writers with a behind-the-scenes look at the various ways he got the ideas for the stories in this collection. Don't be a weenie. Read these stories. If you dare!

A boy discovers the answer to one of the great urban mysteries: why are pigeons always pooping in parks? A second-grade class learns why they should always be nice to their math teacher….An ancient predator uses the internet to search out its prey… A young girl and her little brother escape a campfire weenie only to encounter something even more terrifying: a troupe of Girl Scouts singing campfire songs. For this, his third collection of warped and creepy “weenie” tales, critically-acclaimed author and master of the macabre David Lubar traveled deep into the shadowy corners of his mind, looking for new ways to amuse and terrify his readers. And in the tradition of In the Land of the Lawn Weenies and Invasion of the Road Weenies, he reveals the inspiration behind each of the thirty-five stories at the end of the book.

A girl doesn't have a date for the school dance—until her dad makes one for her in his lab. "Lily—meet Stitchy." A family enjoys a nice Thanksgiving dinner—until they are interrupted by a torrent of turkeys out for revenge. A princess meets a pea-brained suitor. And the battle of two red hot pepper weenies ends in flames. Critically-acclaimed author and master of the macabre David Lubar returns from a journey into the darkest depths of his brain with thirty-five more warped and creepy tales. And in the tradition of the three previous Weenie collections—In the Land of the Lawn Weenies, Invasion of the Road Weenies, and The Curse of the Campfire Weenies—he reveals the inspiration behind each story at the end of the book. Don't be a weenie. Read these stories...if you dare!

A boy steals a ticket to an amusement park and gets the ride of a lifetime—literally. The first day of middle school turns into a free-for-all when the gym teacher offers a "get-out-of-gym-free" card. Sick of his sister's vampire wannabe friends, a kid decides to teach them a lesson at their next party. But the tables are turned when some surprise guests show up. Critically acclaimed author and master of the macabre, David Lubar, is back with thirty more warped and creepy tales for fans of his bestselling Weenies story collections, which have sold more than 1.7 million copies to date. Don't be a weenie. Read these stories. If you dare!

Welcome to the Weenie Zone! Acclaimed author David Lubar is back with his sixth collection of Warped and Creepy Tales, which have sold more than 1.7 million copies Stranded aliens seek out Earth’s most intelligent species. (Hint: It’s not us.) A bully discovers the meaning of “spatial displacement.” Two girls find out why you should never annoy a witch. When a swarm of sneaking, slashing, scurrying ninja weenies invades their neighborhood, a boy and his best friend find a way to fight back. Acclaimed author and master of the macabre David Lubar is back with his sixth collection of warped and creepy tales. Here are thirty-three hilarious and harrowing stories that will scare you, make you laugh, or see the world in a whole new way. Find out where David got the idea for each story at the end of the book. Don’t be a weenie. Read these stories. If you dare!

Wipeout of the Wireless Weenies is the seventh collection of spooky short stories for ages 8 to 12 by the beloved author of the Nathan Abercrombie series, David Lubar. This is the perfect pick for reluctant young readers who like a few chills and a lot of laughs. Welcome to the Weenie Zone! A boy and his family narrowly escape a zombie apocalypse―or do they? A girl neglects her cat's litter box and finds herself in a heap of trouble. And a group of clicking, scrolling, tapping wireless weenies find themselves on the edge of disaster. Here are thirty-three hilarious and harrowing stories that will scare you, make you laugh, or see the world in a whole new way. Find out where the author got the idea for each story at the end of the book. Don't be a weenie. Read these stories. If you dare !

Strikeout of the Bleacher Weenies is the eighth collection of spooky short stories for ages 8 to 12 by the beloved author of the Nathan Abercrombie series, David Lubar. This is the perfect pick for reluctant young readers who like a few chills and a lot of laughs. The appearance of a mysterious new girl in school stops her classmates cold. Black Friday shopping gets out of control for a mother and daughter. And stands full of screaming and shouting Bleacher Weenies are about to make the ultimate sacrifice. Welcome to the Weenie Zone! Here are thirty hilarious and harrowing stories that will scare you, make you laugh, or get you to see the world in a whole new way. Find out where the author got the idea for each story at the end of the book. Don't be a weenie. Read these stories. If you dare!

Master of the macabre David Lubar is back with Check Out the Library Weenies, his ninth collection of Weenies Stories. Here are thirty more scary stories for the middle grade audience—perfect for both avid and reluctant young readers who like a few chills and a lot of laughs. Don't be a weenie. Read these stories. If you dare! "Fans will be shivering and laughing...evilly. —Kirkus Reviews on Strikeout of the Bleacher Weenies "With its mix of humor and chills, this collection is a sure bet for fans of R. L. Stine's Goosebumps series and reluctant readers." —Booklist on Wipeout of the Wireless Weenies "Whoever thinks the short story is dead, or that kids don't like short stories, hasn't talked to any real live kids and hasn't read the latest in this popular series." —School Library Journal on Attack of the Vampire Weenies How to slay vampires for fun and profit—Come back soon—All that glitters—Bald truths—Tough crowd—Gordie's gonna git ya—Fairyland—Off the beaten track—The sword in the stew—The doll collector—Physics for toons—The heart of a dragon—Searching for a fart of gold—On one condition—Ghost dancer—Check out the library weenies—Call me—The running of the hounds—A boy and his frog—Black Friday—Romeo, Romeo, wherefloor Argle Roblio? — My family history—When death comes calling — 2D or not 2D—Mummy misses you—Seeing red—Watch your grammar—At stake—Rumplecodespin—I can't quite put a finger on it—A word or two about these stories—Reading and activity guide